Friday's Funnies

A small boy is sent to bed by his father. Five minutes later:
"Da-aad..."
"What?"
"I'm thirsty. Can you bring me a drink of water?"
"No, you had your chance. Lights out."
Five minutes later:
"Da-aad..."
"WHAT?"
"I'm THIRSTY. Can I have a drink of water?"
"I told you NO! If you ask again, I'm coming in to spank you!"
Five minutes later...
"Daaa-aaaad...When you come in to spank me, can you bring me a drink of water?"


One day the first grade teacher was reading the story of Chicken Little to her class.
She came to the part where Chicken Little warns the farmer.
She read, "...and Chicken Little went up to the farmer and said, "The sky is falling!"
The teacher then asked the class, "And what do you think the farmer said?"
One little girl raised her hand and said, "I think he said: Holy cow! A talking chicken!"
The teacher was unable to teach for the next 10 minutes.