The Wawascene was created by Dr. Mark Stock, former Superintendent of the Wawasee Community School Corporation. Due to its local popularity, Dr. Stock has left the blog site to future Wawasee administrators.

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Saturday, September 30, 2006

Saturday Satire

Indiana Announces New Testing Program

Indiana Education officicals have announced a new standardized testing program that will go farther than any previous testing efforts in an attempt to hold schools accountable for student learning.

The testing efforts will begin before the student's birth and end with college graduation.

State Testing Director, I.M. NumBr Krunchr explained, "This is revolutionary! We will be testing parents before they are permitted to have children. They must pass a standardized parent test that will be used to predict their child's future success in school. This way we will be able to ensure that children are getting an optimum chance at success in school. There is no secret that certain parenting behaviors give students a better chance. We have correlated those behaviors to school success and created test questions that identify those core parenting values. Now the government will simply not allow those parents to birth children unless they can get a certain score."

Critics of the new program have accused the state of "draconian measures" to which I.M. Numbr Krunchr replied, "Hogwash, the business community is worried that we will fall behind China and they already limit parents to one child per couple. It's a global world now. We might as well go a step further."

The new test, which will be an on-line version using technology will be titled, "Indiana Statewide Test for Education and Pupil Proficiency Emphasizing Diplomas IN Instructional Technology (I. S.T.E.P.P.E.D IN I.T.)


itsrich said...

This sounds like Intelligent Design? Oh, wait, that is not approved curriculum.

Anonymous said...

The premise isn't such a bad idea. Some SC Town councilman just called for sterilizing bad parents. But, that is an after the fact solution..sarcasm. I guess my biggest concern would be who would create the test? Reeks of nazism to me. I do agree that many people should wait to have children or bypass it all together.

Anonymous said...

"If you are a 'Dee',
And you marry a 'Dee',
Please don't have kids 'cause
They will be 'Dee-de-dee'!!"

-'The Mind of Mencia',
Comedy Central