Saturday Satire

Sorry I missed the Friday's Funnies posting. Here is some Saturday Satire to make up for it.

Here is a satirical grade change form for a college or high school student. I won't embarrass you by asking you if you actually thought about using any of these in your college days.


Universal Grade Change FormTo: (professor/teacher/instructor)________________________
From:_____________________
I think my grade in your course,_________________, should be changed from___to___for the following reasons:
____The persons who copied my paper made a higher grade than I did.
____The person whose paper I copied made a higher grade than I did.
____This course will lower my GPA and I won't get into:
__Med School __Dental School __Chiropractic School__Acupuncture school __Grad School __Mickey Mouse Club
____I have to get an A in this course to balance the F in ___________.
____I'll lose my scholarship.
____I didn't come to class and the person whose notes I used did not cover the material asked for on the exam.
____I studied the basic principles but the exam wanted every little fact.
____I studied the facts and definitions but the exam asked about general principles.
____I understood the material; I just couldn't do the problems.
____I can work the problems, but your exam expected understanding.
____You are prejudiced against:
__Males __Females __Protestants __Chicanos __Jews __Catholics __Muslims __People __Blacks __Whites __Minorities __Jocks __Students __Young people __Old people
____If I flunk out of school my father will disinherit me or at least cut my allowance.
____I was unable to do well in this course because of the following:
__mono __acute alcoholism __drug addiction __VD __broken finger __pregnancy __fatherhood __I have allergic reaction to brain work __I am intellectually challenged.
____You told us to be creative but you didn't tell us exactly how you wanted that done.
____I was creative and you said I was just shooting the bull.
____The lectures were:
__too detailed to pick out important points
__not explained in sufficient detail
__too boring
__all jokes and no material
__too serious--not enough entertainment to keep me awake.
____All my other profs have agreed to raise my grades.
____I don't have a reason; I just want a higher grade.
____This course was:
__too early, I was not awake.
__too late, I was tired.
__at lunchtime, I was hungry.
____My (dog, cat, gerbil) (ate, wet on, threw up on) my (book, notes, term paper) for this